When I graduate...

When I graduate, I would like to get a job with my internship and move to the city. I would like to get my own apartment with a friend or boyfriend and enjoy living away from home. I would love to prosper in my job and love it and make new friends and have a great life there. I cannot wait to graduate and not have to go to class anymore or spend any more money on my educaiton. I would like to have a decent starting salary and not be working a 9-5 5 days a week. I am very hard working and wouldn't mind working a lot, however i would like to deviate away from that work week schedule. I would also like to pay back my loans within 5 years. I am very good at saving money and paying things on time. I would also like to keep my credit in good shape. I would love the opportunity to travel as well. Hopefully my job will allow me the opportunity to do so.

New Reality TV show

The reality TV show that I would be on would be Real World Road Rules challenge. Its a show on MTV where ex-REAL WORLD stars and road rules stars compete on challenges for a prize at the end. It is one of my favortie shows because of the way the game is played. Each time it is set up a different way, so a different strategy to win is used each time. For example, in one season your own team decides who to vote into the gauntlet (the gaunlet is where one teammate from each side must compete one-on-one and the loser is the one to go home, after each challenge one memeber from each team is choosen to go into the gauntlet). On another season the OTHER team picks someone from your team to go in. It sounds like a simple change but it changes the entire dynamic of the game. All of the challengers live in one house together, so it is a very dramaic show, most are in their late 20s and some in their 30s. The players are constantly forming alliances and making friends in what they think are the right places, however once the players are split into known alliances, then you have enemies as well.

If I were to go on the show I would work out all pre-season and be the one that never partied at night. So many of the challengers go home due to fighting. At night when everytone is drinking is when drama starts; hence enemies created and fighting. I would have the mind set to win the money and play the game as best I could.

The only thing I ever wanted was...

The only thing I ever wanted was to graduate college and start an actual life. Be able to move anywhere I wanted to and get a job that offered me stability and the ability to be self-dependant.
However, I wish I could have told myself to not waste time worrying about those things and that everything falls into place. To just enjoy where I am in the moment and stop trying to over-plan the future. You did all the right things and ended up in the right place. But if you keep on the path of trying to achieve future goals, you'll never fully apprichate the present.

Things I will never do

-hurt someone intensionally for no reason
-rob someone or steal
-throw money in the garbage
-tell my boss to keep my paycheck- I will work for free
-become famous-I dont really know why anyone would want to
-not stick up for my family
-sit back and watch someone get bullied or stepped on
-silence my opinion (but not disrespectfully)
-let someone walk over me
-stop trying: whenever you give up, someone else, most likely undeserving ,will take your spot
-stop working/supporting myself
-stop learning
-close off my mind to a subject
-tell someone they are stupid
-stop laughing
-let my fears keep me from anything
-let the judgments of others change my mind
-stop trusting myself
-listen to AM instead of FM radio
-eat meat
-give up quality time with someone to text or surf the web on my phone

Guilty pleasures

I have many guilty pleasures that I feel bad about but most likely shouldnt. Im sure everyone has them and there must be a reason why we enjoy them. . .So, the following are my guilty pleasures and/or things that I do that I feel bad about:

Sometimes when a friend calls I ignore it, not because I am in the middle of something but because I would rather call them back when I am in a mood to listen and talk. I listen to cliche music like Maroon 5 or Britney Spears sometimes when I drive, and I roll the windows up when I feel like people are looking at me funny for doing it. I like to drink wine and order chinese food and watch Sex and the City when I am having a bad day. I will grab Cosmo instead of New York Times, some days my life is so stressful that I need to read nonsense. I will shop online and add everything I want to the 'Cart' and then exit the site when I am done. I sometimes google jokes-just so i have them on hand if i ever need to tell them or cheer someone up. Organizing my closet and sending clothes i dont wear anymore to good will. Finishing a book in one day. Listening to someone try to recover from a lie. Knowing that I am doing better in a class than someone who I dislike. Going on job interviews and answering every question with great answers. Playing rockband by myself on solo tour.

The Truth is...

1. Good conquers evil
2. Honesty is good
3. Honesty can feel bad
4. Things can be YOUR definition of perfect
5. Everyone has a true love
6. There are good people
7. Dancing burns more calories than running
8. Laughing is the best medicine
9. The sky is blue, but can be red, purple, orange, or pink
10. I don't know where i'll be in 10 years
11. I don't know where i'll be in 1 year
12. My family made me who I am
13. Every mistake has a lesson
14. People forget things
15. Your happiness is important
16. My socks rarely match
17. When i like a movie I watch it 100 times
18. Anything can be art
19. People are judgmental
20. Art is created for individual interpretation

AFRAID: words that come to mind

competing, health, of being judged, life, tasks, security, happiness, mistake, balance, future, stuck, lost, insignifigance, chances, hour-glass, failing, choice, falling, emotions, panic, uncontrollable, reprocussions, time, regrets, repeating mistakes, becoming a cliche, accomplishment, loss, helplessness, disappointing, expectations, nightmares, subconcious

20 things i enjoy doing

1. Sleeping in
2. Free time
3. reading books that I want to read and have choosen myself
4. learing new things (guitar, drums, cooking, skateboarding, surfing, etc)
5. Going on vacations
6. going out to dinner with friends
7. painting, drawing, sketching
8. loving a new song
9. decorating a room
10. community service
11. washing my car
12. organizing my room
13. going to the beach
14. writing because i want to, not because it is an asignment
15. watching a great movie
16. debating a topic
17. teaching or showing someone else something new and interesting
18. helping someone out (with homework, advice, etc)
19. Getting someone a birthday present, throwing surprise parties, planning events
20. relaxing with family and friends

10 worst things that can happen to you on your way to work/school

1. Get a speeding ticket
2. spill coffee or food on your outift
3. get a flat tire
4. you check your messages and your boss asked you to work late tonight
5. you forgot your essay paper
6. you realize you never did an essay that is due today
7. the radio plays commercials the entire way
8. your cell phone dies
9. you forgot lunch and have no money on you
10. You aren't wearing a hood or have an umbrella and it starts to rain

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My ideal life would be to travel all over the world and experience different cultures. I would like to see the country that I live in as well, the southern states and the west coast. I feel that New Jersey can be like a bubble that is easy to get stuck in. Having my entire family living in the state and having gone to college in-state makes me feel like I have to get an apartment here and then buy a house here. However, I dream of seeing Iceland, India, Turkey, Egypt, and Italy. I would like to see these places because I think life is too short not to. Not only will I visit these places, but I would consider living in any of them. Why stay in a place for life when there could be a better fit out there for you?

            In my ideal life I would be done with school and have a career writing, maybe for a travel magazine. I think that as long as I am on the move I will be happy. Changes in my life that I can make to work toward that goal would be to make sure I am not tied down. Paying off my student loans and not getting into any contracts that lock me in one place, as in a house or an apartment. I believe that saving up enough money and just picking one place to visit will get the ball rolling.